When Your Kids Reject the Faith

‘I don’t believe in God anymore’

I’ve been hearing from a lot of parents whose teens are rejecting their faith.  The stories are all terrifically painful…

When teens fight you about Church, it usually has little to do with their actual beliefs about God or church.  Usually, a teen’s apparent rejection of his or her faith has to do with one of two things; a personal encounter with suffering he or she can’t make sense of or the breakdown of their relationship with you…

Well worth a read. Rest here.

 

One in Ten Children Asked for a Daddy for Christmas

This is the real culture war:

A truly heartbreaking story broke over Christmas. A British consumer agency released a survey that showed that the tenth most requested gift from Father Christmas was “a dad” (coming in just behind “snow”). The first choice was a baby brother or sister, which is a heartening sign that materialism hasn’t quite claimed our souls yet. But the stand out figure is one that shows that a growing number of children see a father not as a “given” but as a “blessing” – as precious and elusive as a Nintendo Wii…

On Christmas Day, the Washington Times published some sad facts about the changing face of the American family:

In every state, the portion of families where children have two parents, rather than one, has dropped significantly over the past decade. Even as the country added 160,000 families with children, the number of two-parent households decreased by 1.2 million. Fifteen million U.S. children, or 1 in 3, live without a father, and nearly 5 million live without a mother. In 1960, just 11 percent of American children lived in homes without fathers.

More here.

Heartbreaking indeed. But it is more than just a cultural war. It is profoundly spiritual.

My son, who turns 13 at the end of next month, drew this illustration a couple of years ago. (Traditionalists please forgive the orientation). I keep it in my Bible and it serves to remind me of my responsibility towards him and his sister.

The other piece I keep with it, tucked in the Bible, is by Dr James Dobson:

Through the Darkness

I’m told that when I was a very small child—maybe two years of age— my family lived in a one-bedroom apartment, and my little bed was located beside the bed of my parents. My father said that it was common during that time for him to awaken at night to a little voice that was whispering, “Daddy? Daddy? Daddy?”

My father would answer quietly, “What, Jimmy? And I would say, “Hold my hand!” My dad would reach across the darkness and grope for my little hand, finally engulfing it in his. He said later that the instant he had my hand firmly in his grip, my arm would become limp and my breathing deep and regular. I would immediately fall back to sleep.

You see, I only wanted to know that he was there! Until the day he died, I continued to reach for him—for his assurance, for his guidance—but mostly just to know that he was there.

Then, so very quickly, I found myself in my dad’s place. And I wanted to be there for my children—not just a name on their birth certificate, but a strong, warm, and loving presence in their lives.

You see, a dad occupies a place in a child’s heart that no one else can satisfy. So to all the men out there who are blessed to be called fathers: I urge you to be there for the little ones in your life who call you “Dad.”

So if you are a Dad, then please, just be that, and be there! Christlike, and faithful.

 

Disability: A Thread for Weaving Joy

A Public Discourse by Archbishop Charles J Chaput who, if I may add, is one of the best Archbishops I have ever listened to.

The great French Jesuit Henri de Lubac once wrote, “Suffering is the thread from which the stuff of joy is woven. Never will the optimist know joy.” Those seem like strange words, especially for Americans. We Americans take progress as an article of faith. And faith in progress demands a spirit of optimism.

But Father de Lubac knew that optimism and hope are very different creatures. In real life, bad things happen. Progress is not assured, and things that claim to be “progress” can sometimes be wicked and murderous instead. We can slip backward as a nation just as easily as we can advance. This is why optimism—and all the political slogans that go with it—are so often a cheat. Real hope and real joy are precious. They have a price. They emerge from the experience of suffering, which is made noble and given meaning by faith in a loving God…

The American Jesuit scholar Father John Courtney Murray once said that “Anyone who really believes in God must set God, and the truth of God, above all other considerations.”

Here’s what that means…

Find out here.

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Okay, this is off the above topic but just to clarify my opening statement (about the Archbishop being so good), give this short snippet a view.

 

 

Children are Being Abandoned on Greece’s Streets

Children ‘dumped in streets by Greek parents who can’t afford to look after them any more’

Shocking!

Children are being abandoned on Greece’s streets by their poverty-stricken families who cannot afford to look after them any more.

Youngsters are being dumped by their parents who are struggling to make ends meet in what is fast becoming the most tragic human consequence of the Euro crisis.

It comes as pharmacists revealed the country had almost run out of aspirin, as multi-billion euro austerity measures filter their way through society…

More here.

What a mess!

Lord have mercy…

 

iParent: Steve Jobs

Steve Job said: Having Children is 10,000 times better than anything he’d ever done.

Steve Jobs and his wife Laurene

Which would you rather have in your lap right now: a baby or a new iPad? If the answer is ‘iPad’ then you need to keep reading.

There are likely hundreds of CEOs and thousands of people in the world who wish they could be “as innovative and successful as Steve Jobs.” In the days following the death of the Apple genius, a story caught my eye about his perspective on father in the shadow of death.

Dean Ornish, quoted in the New York Times, said of Steve Jobs: “I once asked him if he was glad that he had kids, and he said, ‘It’s 10,000 times better than anything I’ve ever done.’”

To better appreciate this, let’s just take a quick look at some things that Steve Jobs did:

• Macintosh (including the computer “mouse” and the “windows” style operating system – My family had a Mac IIsi when I was middle school – I was the only kid printing out pretty book reports – my English teacher always admired my fonts)
•  iPods (do you remember the first time that you saw one?)
•  iPhones (with touch screens)
•  iPad (with touch screens)
•  iTunes (the popularization of mp3s and podcasts)
•  Apple Store
•  Apps (yes “apps” is now an English word)
•  Pixar Studies (Toy Story, Cars, etc.)
•  a billionaire at least 6 times over

What a list. Yet Steve Jobs says that having children is for him “10,000 times better” than all these accomplishments combined. He had one child in his early 20s out of wedlock and later three more children with his wife.

As a father of six, I also know that having children is a blessing and a test. There is nothing so difficult and nothing so rewarding. You probably have not heard this Jobs quote because it is precisely what America and the West don’t want to hear. Having a family is more rewarding and a greater accomplishment than anything that even the best inventor/CEO/billionaire can accomplish.

Jobs’ epiphany reflects Odysseus’ decision at the end of Plato’s Republic. Happiness is not found in being famous, royal, or rich. The wise man, like Odysseus, knows that contentment is found in being a simple man with a simple life. Death is the app through which we can see what is most important: being a spouse, parent, and friend.

“Behold the inheritance of the Lord are children: the reward, the fruit of the womb.” (Psalm 126:3, D-R)

Your Kids Are OK With This Child Killer, Right?

On The Creative Minority Report:

This just shows how little concern our culture has for children. A judge just said it’s all okey dokey if two kids live with a…child killer. Oh don’t freak out, she only killed the kids because she was stressed out at the time.

The LA Times reports:

She was a Brownie troop leader, a room mother, a Sunday school teacher and almost the definition of an Orange County soccer mom — until she shot her two small daughters to death in 1991 while they slept in their home in
Laguna Niguel, Calif.

Kristine Cushing, then 39, said she was the victim of anti-depression medication, a debilitating heart condition and worry over the impending dissolution of her 17-year marriage to former Marine Corps fighter pilot John Cushing Jr. when she shot her daughters, ages 4 and 8, and then attempted to kill herself.

She was found not guilty by reason of insanity and spent four years in a mental hospital. In 2005, California
authorities concluded that she posed no risk and granted her an unconditional release.

Fast forward to now: The Cushings are back together, living on Vashon Island in Washington state, and an Oregon woman who married John Cushing four years after the killings has temporarily lost her legal bid to prevent her own teenage sons from living with the couple.

In his ruling, King County Superior Court Judge William Downing said Trisha Conlon, who only recently discovered that Kristine was living in the home, has not proved that Kristine Cushing poses an immediate threat to Conlon’s two boys, ages 13 and 14, though he called for a full investigation to determine an appropriate final order.

So it’s ok if children go live with a child killer? What?

Here’s the thing. I guess the judge’s perspective is that the woman served her time and you can’t hold her past crimes against her. Or something. But how about the fact that she spent just four years inside an institution for killing her kids. Shouldn’t killing your kids be a pretty important crime? Kind of a big deal?

If she was spending her life behind bars we wouldn’t have some moronic judge allowing children to live with her. Lunacy. Absolute lunacy.

Child Forced to Wear ‘Thief’ Sign by Mother

“Do not trust me.   I will steal from you as I am a thief.”

Taking punishment too far:

A seaside town in Australia is in uproar over the punishment a mother has handed out to her young son, making him wear a sign in public labelling him a thief.

‘Do not trust me. I will steal from you as I am a thief,’ the sign around his neck read as he stood in a park in Townsville in Queensland.

The boy, aged about 10, remained standing with his head lowered in shame while his family ate lunch nearby.

But his humiliation did not end there – he was made to wear Shrek ears and was also seen writing lines, believed to say repeatedly that he would not steal.

While his family may have deemed the public humiliation applicable, parents who saw the boy wearing the sign were
appalled.

One woman, Diane Mayers, said she was so ‘horrified’ that she contacted the local child safety services.

She told the Townsville Bulletin newspaper: ‘The boy just kept his head down and was staring at the ground.

‘A lot of people walked past and were laughing at him.’

The punishment was also condemned by child psychologist Nicole Pierotti – herself a mother – who said she was shocked that
this treatment was used…

The rest here.

Marriage Matters

Writes  Dr Jim West:

And cohabitation harms children, according to a study released on the 16th of the month. Here’s a direct link to the pdf.

Today, the rise of cohabiting households with children is the largest unrecognized threat to the quality and stability of children’s family lives. In fact, because of the growing prevalence of cohabitation, which has risen fourteen-fold since 1970, today’s children are much more likely to spend time in a cohabiting household than they are to see their parents divorce.

Here are the study’s findings:

- Children are less likely to thrive in cohabiting households, compared to intact, married families.

- Family instability is generally bad for children.

And

- The growing instability of American family life also means that contemporary adults and children are more likely to live in what scholars call “complex households,”

There’s much more in the report which everyone should read, and take quite seriously.

Russian Priest: Don’t Abort your Children. Give them to me!

Interfax – Head of the Moscow Patriarchate Department for Relations with the Armed Forces Archpriest Dimitry Smirnov promises to help those women who refuse from abortion and chose to give birth to their babies.

“I always give one reason: Why do you need to kill? Give the baby to me, no problem. I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t use bad words, and I have two university degrees,” Father Dimitry said in A Matter of Principle TV program.

“My parish is one of the largest both in Moscow and globally, and not a single woman among my parishioners is willing to make an abortion. If we manage to stop abortions, we get an immediate growth,” he believes.

According to Father Dimitry, he visited a Moscow maternity clinic, and each woman there explained her intention to make an abortion with financial challenges.

“I was telling them we could give our guarantee to meet those challenges. But my own biggest problem was that not a single woman turned for help to me,” he said.

The above was here.

Chores or ‘Forced Labour’?

11-year-old doing chores phones police complaining of ‘forced labour’

The headline caught my attention in the The Telegraph:

A German boy doing chores at home phoned the police to complain he was being made to do “forced labour”.

The 11-year-old from the western German city of Aachen phoned on Monday to make his complaint, adding that his mother “made him work all day”, police said.

“I have to work all day long. I haven’t any free time,” the boy told authorities over the phone.

His mother, who was not identified, later told police her son had been complaining over the holidays of having to help around the house, and had   repeatedly threatened to call the police over such “forced labour”.

When she asked him to pick up paper on the floor, he dialled the 110 police emergency number.

“He plays all day long and when told to tidy up what he’s done, he calls it forced labour,” police quoted his mother as saying.

Lazy little imp.